Matt and Chaundra Eagar: Homesick

Uganda is breathtakingly beautiful. Usually, after the kids go to school, I sit on my front steps and listen to the birds chirp, the palm leaves rustle in the wind, whilst the hustle of Makindye Hill goes on outside my gate. The weather is great - neither too hot or too cold, and recently after a long dry season, we’ve had a few refreshing and rejuvenating rains. I have banana trees in the back of the yard which yield lots of good eating. Leftovers go into many different forms of cakes, breads and pancakes, with some still around to give away. My husband is doing what he loves and what God has called him to do. My children are thriving here, each one growing in leaps and bounds and understanding more Luganda everyday. I have to admit, life is really sweet.

Our kids in the Mpigi Forest, Uganda

But today has just been one of those days… maybe jumpstarted by a boy up and sick to his stomach all night - but all of a sudden the rustling palms sound like crumpling cardboard and the hustle outside the gate sounds like a riot, and I swear to you, if I ever see another banana again, I may just scream.

Beam me up, Scotty! I’m homesick.

I’m homesick for family. For sleepovers with grandparents and coffees and ice creams with friends. The moments in the summer where we stay up late around the fire and time stands still. That first magical snow of winter when i want to just linger outside until my fingers are too cold to feel.

I’m homesick for walks to the grocery store, and the bus stop and for raking leaves and sharing treats with neighbours. Roadtrips to the rocky beach (my favourite) and tomatoes from my garden. I’m homesick for Nana’s biscuits, with baked beans and ham and heck, even lobster.

Friends in our treehouse in Canada

I fear the moments my kids are missing are those magical moments of childhood that we can’t get back - so I’m homesick for those, too.

But instead of feeling sorry for myself, I will focus on the here and now, and the things that are nearest and dearest to me, Matt and my three beautiful children. All I can say, is that You are all I need, and I trust Your plans for us.

You, Lord, are all I have, and you give me all I need; my future is in your hands. psalms 16:9

Before this, I have never felt such happiness and sadness, joy and frustration, independence and loneliness, adventure and fear all coming at me at once. But I do know that never before this very moment have I felt that I am exactly where I am supposed to be… living in the palm of God’s hand.